Cinnamon Rolls

Before I talk about these beautiful, delicious rolls of love... let me tell you 5 reasons why these should not invoke any guilty conscious in you when you make them (and eat all of them).

1. Cinnamon. Cinnamon is good for you. It's high in antioxidants, helps digestion, and also lowers stress!

2. Has enough carbohydrates to make you want to wrestle a bear. And really, hasn't everyone always wanted to wrestle a bear before?

3. You actually can tell people what ingredients go in them! Bet you can't do that with your regular old supermarket cinnamon rolls.

4. They give you a work-out! Rollin' the dough out for these babies is like running a marathon. You'll have so much arm muscle after this you'll be able to lift up a car! (disclaimer: please do not actually attempt said statement after eating cinnamon rolls as it may cause hip displacement or other injuries to vital areas)

5. It makes 7 pans. 7. Pans. What are you going to do with 7 pans of cinnamon rolls?! You practically have to give them away! This recipe actually ENCOURAGES will-power, selflessness, and kindness to your neighbors! (even if you're still pissed at them for stealing your mail for a year)

Now that we've gotten that over with, we can continue with how amazing these cinnamon rolls are. They will make men propose to you. Make your manager give you a raise. They'll make you the most popular chick (or guy) around. Soon enough, people will be begging you to make more. In fact, they'll demand it. They are that good.

Just don't tell anyone it has four and a half sticks of butter in it. Especially not Jillian Michaels. She might come to my house and make me do burpies.

I hate burpies.

Really, though, if you want to make a special treat... This is it. This recipe makes A LOT of cinnamon rolls... so if you make the full recipe, be prepared to give some away. I gave two batches to my neighbor, three to my work (they were gone two days), and froze the last two. They are better than any cinnamon rolls you'll buy from a bakey. And people will be super impressed when you tell them you made them yourself. I highly recommend starting the night before and finishing it in the morning. You can easily freeze these like I did after their done baking or before you put them in the oven. Either way, people will be singing your praises.

Just make sure you save one for yourself.
Remember: Cinnamon rolls make your digestion better.

And who doesn't like being regular?

Right?
...Right?

...

*cricket*

Better Than Supermarket Cinnamon Rolls with Maple Frosting

INGREDIENTS

Rolls:
1 quart whole milk
1 cup vegetable oil
1 cup sugar
2 packages active dry yeast (o.25 oz packets)
8 cups (plus 1 cup flour, separated) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon (heaping) baking powder
1 teaspoon (scant) baking soda
2 cups butter (4 sticks butter), melted
2 cups sugar
Generous amount of ground cinnamon


Maple Frosting

2lbs powdered sugar (1 large bag)
1/4 cup real maple syrup
1/2 cup milk
1/4 cup melted butter
1/4 cup brewed coffee
1/8tsp salt

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Mix the milk, vegetable oil and sugar in a pan. Scald the mixture (heat until just before the boiling point). Turn off heat and leave to cool 45 minutes to 1 hour. When the mixture is lukewarm to warm, but NOT hot, sprinkle in both packages of Active Dry Yeast. Let this sit for a minute. Then add 8 cups of all-purpose flour. Stir mixture together. Cover and let rise for at least an hour.

2. After rising for at least an hour, add 1 more cup of flour, the baking powder, baking soda and salt. Stir mixture together. (At this point, you could cover the dough and put it in the fridge until you need it – overnight or even a day or two, if necessary. Just keep your eye on it and if it starts to overflow out of the pan, just punch it down).

3. When ready to prepare rolls: Sprinkle rolling surface generously with flour. Take half the dough and form a rough rectangle. Then roll the dough thin, maintaining a general rectangular shape. Drizzle 1/2 to 1 cup melted butter over the dough. Now sprinkle 1 cup of sugar over the butter followed by a generous sprinkling of cinnamon.

4. Now, starting at the opposite end, begin rolling the dough in a neat line toward you. Keep the roll relatively tight as you go. Next, pinch the seam of the roll to seal it.

5. Spread 1 tablespoon of melted butter in a seven inch round foil cake or pie pan. Then begin cutting the rolls approximately ¾ to 1 inch thick and laying them in the buttered pans.

6. Repeat this process with the other half of the dough. Let the rolls rise for 20 to 30 minutes, then bake at 400 degrees (see note below) until light golden brown, about 15 to 18 minutes.

For the frosting, mix together all ingredients listed and stir well until smooth. It should be thick but pourable. Taste and adjust as needed. Generously drizzle over the warm rolls. Go crazy and don’t skimp on the frosting.